overload my motherboard
by klausmikaelson
Summary: On a whim, Caroline hops on a plane to New Orleans to visit Klaus. Encountering him languishing in a poppy field, little does she know that she is about to commence the data transfer of her life.


New Orleans is hot but not as hot as Klaus' throbbing disco stick is Caroline's first thought as she watches the city move beneath her. There's something oddly entrancing about watching the city slowly revolve beneath her, as she comes in to land like an aeroplane upon the moist ground. Oh, to fuck Klaus against the wet, soggy track, she thought to herself before shaking her head. No, she had ended things with Klaus after they had had their little encounter against a tree in Mystic Falls but then why did she feel so aroused by the thought of his muscular body pressing against hers, just as it had done all those years ago.

She had left Mystic Falls without a second thought – fed up of Elena being a whiny bitch and Bonnie being annoying as fuck and the lack of Alaric Saltzman and also hot hybrids to have sex with. Tyler certainly wasn't up to standard, in more ways than one #winkyface, his disco stick being roughly the size of a shriveled banana, absolutely incomparable to Klaus' monster sworded disco stick. Mmhm. Just the thought of it makes Caroline as moist as the New Orlean's pavement. It is good. All she wants right now is for Klaus to plunge his disco stick into her USB Port and import his data onto her hard-drive. Damn, he could penetrate her circuit board any day.

Now all she has to do is find Klaus to have all her wildest dreams fulfilled - it wouldn't be hard to find him, she guesses, as her heart (and USB port) seemed to be wired to locate his disco stick. All she has to do is follow the throbbing ache inside of her and alakazam – disco stick and USB port would be one once more. Hot hybrid sex against a tree, version 2.0. Just the way fate has planned it. If he exists, God is probably looking down on them and smiling, as his master plan of intense data overloading is finally about to be installed. Again.

She finds Klaus on the outskirts of town, lounging in a poppy field for no apparent reason except that of comparing the redness of the poppies to his throbbing disco stick.

"Hello, Caroline," he says extracting his hands from his pockets. Caroline anticipates those warm, steady hands caressing her boobs, just as an SD card anticipates being plunged into a socket. She notices his disco stick already starting the form a tent in his chique chinos. Good, she thinks. The preparation for download is nearly complete. We can commence blast off.

"Klaus," Caroline acknowledges, trying to keep her voice even, refusing the give into craving for more hot hybrid sex against various trees. She had to keep her cool. Cool as a motherfucking cucumber. Actually fuck keeping cool. She was hot. Much like her very nearly overloaded USB port.

She was ready to pounce.

But Klaus gets there before her, his hands smothering her SD cards with such vigour that for a moment, she is scared they will disconnect. "Oh, Klaus," she moans, "you very nearly overloaded my hard-drive."

"That's what I'm here for, love," he snarls, as the last metal encasing of her ripped shirt falls away from her gloriously perky SD cards, "that and the murder of your ex hybrid, whose hotness and disco stick spent their entire pitiless lives downloading in my superior shadow."

"Oh, Klaus, you do know how to talk dirty to me," Caroline groans, as she imagines Tyler's walnut sized disco stick crumbling to mere chips of metal as the might of Klaus' is truly unveiled.

Lowering her onto to the bed of poppies, Klaus fingers play across her naked SD cards, moving down her body the way fingers move across a keyboard. His fingers move momentarily away from her flesh to undo the buckle of her high waist shorts which already showed the round arc of her bum. "Don't cancel the data import," she moans, body bucking, reaching for his USB stick like fingers to enter her port.

"Never," Klaus replies, leaning forwards and prepping himself for entry. Slowly, his fingers infiltrate her system and Caroline's USB port responds with such ferocious agreement that Klaus' USB sticks almost disappear up to the keychain at their end.

"It is almost time for phase two, love," he utters, as her USB port climaxes around his fingers. Ensuring he uses the correct safety precautions, Klaus removes his USB sticks slowly but surely, feeling Caroline's port protest at the withdrawal.

Caroline's moans of frustration at the timed-out connection are cut short with squeals of pleasure, as Klaus finally unveils his disco stick from its claustrophobic casing.

"Now let me import some of my data onto you," Caroline whispers seductively, kneeling in front of Klaus' throbbing disco stick, before taking it into her perfectly red rimmed disc drive, which was incidentally, the same colour as the poppies in which they languished lustfully #alliteration.

Klaus' system whirs in excitement, as hot as the bottom of a laptop, as Caroline seductively draws his throbbing disco stick closer to her waiting disc drive.

"Import in progress," Klaus pants, his hands gripping her shoulders and the tips of his fingers trailing her SD cards. "Please don't shut down your computer."

"Never," Caroline murmurs huskily, as Klaus finishes importing into her mouth.

"IMPORT SUCCESSFUL," he shouts, between moans of pleasure, "let us commence stage three. Upgrade in progress."

"Blast off in three, two one," Caroline murmurs, as Klaus slides down into the frolicking poppies beside her, "my systems are ready."

"Upgrade complete," groans Klaus, as he glides into position, ready for penetration to begin.

For one tense, blissful moment, their bodies and wires entwine closer together, until not even one molecule could hope to slide between their bodies, glistening with sweat and the rain that Caroline had compared her USB port to not so long ago. Now, she is even moister.

The disco stick is unleashed.

The USB port is ready to receive, captain.

It begins, starting slowly as Caroline's port welcomes his disco stick, before climaxing into one heated moment, redder than the poppies in which they lie.

Finally, the upload finishes as they explode around one another in one passionate surge of electricity and data transfer.

"Goddamn," pants Klaus, "you overloaded my motherboard."

"I think we need to force quit and restart," Caroline replies, collapsing back in the poppies, the colour of which was similar to their flushed faces, and thinking that soon enough, she'd be ready for hot hybrid sex, version 3.0.

They are going to need a bigger external hard-drive.


End file.
